Someday I Want To Be Rich. Some People Get So Rich They Lose All Respect For Humanity. That’s How Rich I Want To Be.
- Rita Rudner
I Love Being Married. It’s So Great To Find That One Special Person You Want To Annoy For The Rest Of Your Life.
Before I Met My Husband, I’d Never Fallen In Love, Though I’d Stepped In It A Few Times.
Neurotics Build Castles In The Air, Psychotics Live In Them. My Mother Cleans Them.
I Wonder If Other Dogs Think Poodles Are Members Of A Weird Religious Cult.
Most Turkeys Taste Better The Day After; My Mother’s Tasted Better The Day Before.
When I Meet A Man I Ask Myself, ‘Is This The Man I Want My Children To Spend Their Weekends With?’
In Hollywood A Marriage Is A Success If It Outlasts Milk.
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